It's A James and Lily Thing
by koolkat983417
Summary: James Potter and Lily Evens absolutely hate each other. But, when a potions accident causes them to switch bodies, will their feelings change? Based on the movie 'It's A Boy Girl Thing'. R&R!


**I Don't Own Harry Potter Or It's A Boy Girl Thing**

Lily Evans was a 17 year old witch, at the school of Hogwarts for Witchcraft and Wizardry. She was in Gryffindor house, but everyone said (and she privately agreed) she should really be in Ravenclaw. She was a very bright girl, with flaming red hair and emerald green eyes. She spent a lot of her time studying, as this was her final year and NEWTs were coming up in a few months. She had always loved school, and this, unfortunately, seemed to mean that she didn't have many close friends. She didn't mind however, as she had her books for company. That was all she really needed.

While her dorm mates, Alice, Mary and Marlene; were out at a party in the Ravenclaw common room, Lily settled down in her four poster bed with her favourite muggle classic; _Romeo and Juliet._

She sighed in contentment and opened to the marked page and started to read. "Come, gentle night, come, loving, black-brow'd night, give me my Romeo; and, when he shall die, take him and cut him out in little stars, and he will make the face of heaven so fine that all the world will be in love with night."

Suddenly, her blissfully peaceful reading was interrupted by outside noise; rap music. Lily determinedly stared at her page, trying to concentrate, but every beautiful line of Shakespeare was interrupted by the obnoxious music. Knowing exactly where it was coming from, Lily stormed out of the girl's dorm, through the common room, up the left set of stairs, and knocked firmly on the door to the seventh year's boy's dorm.

When she received no reply, she kicked it hard and shouted "excuse me!"

The door swung open, the rap music blared out louder than ever. Before her, stood the tall, muscular, and very shirtless, James Potter.

"WHAT?" he yelled over the 'music'.

"WILL YOU TURN THAT DOWN?" Lily screamed.

"Sorry can't hear you," he grinned and danced back into his room.

"Turn the noise down!" Lily made a big winding motion with her arm, as if she could turn it down just by doing that.

James walked out of his room and stood in front her. "I'm sorry did you say something?"

"I'm trying to read, but it is impossible with that racket going on!" Lily placed her hands firmly on her hips.

"It's not a racket that's the weird sisters!" (**A/N: I know they're not rap or current at this time but I don't know any other wizard bands.) **James said indignantly.

"Whatever it is can you please switch it off?" Lily almost begged.

"What's it worth?" He asked, taking a step closer to Lily.

She was suddenly aware of his very bare chest, and the fact that she was wearing her pink teddy pyjamas. "Uuum… the gratitude of a music lover?"

He grinned. "Alright, I'll turn it off."

Lily murmured a thank you and turned to leave when he spoke again.

"If you flash me."

"WHAT? YOU ARE PIG SLIME!" Lily yelled, outraged that he'd even suggest it.

"I've already seen them," James shrugged and turned to leave.

"YOU HAVE NOT!" Lily pushed him into his room and slammed the door shut behind her.

This was not Lily's lucky night though, as the corner of her pyjama top got caught in the door, ripping it off the shirt completely.

Hearing Lily's scream, James flung the door open. Lily covered her chest protectively but glared at James.

"Have now!" James laughed and closed the door again.

Lily raced back to her room and repaired her ripped shirt with magic. She felt tears sting in her eyes but wiped them away angrily. She wasn't going to cry over James Potter. Though as she heard the weird sister's blast from the other end of Gryffindor tower, she decided she might kill him.

The next morning, Lily woke up and turned to look at her dorm mates. They were all lazing around, and refusing to get up. Lily was positive they were hung-over from last night's party. She quietly, as so not to disturb them, climbed out of bed and neatly folded the covers. Her cat jumped onto the bed and looked at her reproachfully.

"Good morning Mr Fluffy," Lily said softly, stroking her pet's head.

She looked through her underwear drawer for the pair that had 'Tuesday' written on them. She liked to keep her underwear coordinated. Lily dressed in her uniform, and collected the books she would need for the day. She left the tower just as her fellow Gryffindors were waking up to face the day.

xxxxx

On the other side of the tower, James and his three best friends were stirring grumpily. They were all rather hung-over as well; except for James of course, as he had skipped the party.

"Padfoot, are you up yet?" James called to his best friend, Sirius Black, from the bathroom.

His reply was a lot of grumbles.

"UP UP UP UP!" Remus, James's second best friend, yelled and tossed Sirius out of his bed.

"5 minutes?" came the hopeful voice from the last bed in the room.

"No Peter. Up you get!" James instructed.

"Prongs please?"

"Wormtail, get up. We're going to miss breakfast," Remus said.

"I'm up!" he said instantly.

"This is going to be a long morning Moony," James commented.

xxxxx

Down in the breakfast hall, Lily sat at one end of the table with her friend Alice, and Alice's boyfriend Frank. They were whispering to each other, and ignoring Lily for the most part. Lily was used to not getting a lot of attention, and didn't think much of it. She served her regular bowl of oatmeal with fresh fruit and a glass of pumpkin juice. Opening her battered copy of _Romeo and Juliet _she set it against the fruit bowl and started where she had been rudely interrupted last night. She blocked out the noise of the Great Hall and ate her oatmeal peacefully.

The owls came as per usual that morning, but unlike most mornings, Lily had a letter.

"What is it?" Alice asked her.

"It's from my mother," Lily said, opening the letter. Inside was a letter from Oxford University. They had asked to see her for an interview next week. There was also a note from her mother.

_Dear Lily,_

_I applied for early admission for Oxford, and they want to interview you! Naturally I didn't tell them about where you are currently at school, just that you were at a boarding school. Aren't you excited? My little girl, going to Oxford! I've fixed it up with Professor Dumbledore for you to take a day off next week to go to Oxford for the interview. He's also going to rewrite your report card so that it is- how did he put it- muggle friendly. I'll be picking you up next week! _

_Love Mom._

"She's really excited for me to go to this muggle university," Lily said to Alice after showing her the letter.

"That's fabulous Lily! Now finish you're oatmeal or we'll be late for class," Alice smiled and left the table with Frank.

xxxxx

Meanwhile, at the other end of the hall, James and his mates were discussing Quidditch loudly, and the upcoming match against Slytherin. There was going to be professional Quidditch scouts at that game, and James (being the captain of the Gryffindor team) was desperate to catch their attention.

"Eat up Prongs!" Sirius piled bacon and eggs and the rest of the fatty fried breakfast foods onto James's plate. "You need stamina and strength to win this game!"

"It's next week Padfoot," Peter said stupidly.

"You don't become a big strong man in one day Wormy," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Well said Moony!" Sirius exclaimed. "EAT PRONGS!"

James picked up his bacon with his fingers and took a large bite, just as the owl post arrived. He had a letter from his father.

_Hey there son! _

_I heard all about the big game coming up! I have faith in you! The next week is the most important of your life, prepare yourself accordingly. Remember though, if those scouts don't pick you up, then you'll always have a job at the ministry with me. _

_Good luck James!_

_Your dad. _

James made a face and threw the letter away.

"You don't want to work for the ministry?" Sirius teased.

They all pretended to vomit into their plate of grease, and then laughed their way to class.

As they strutted along the hallways, winking at pretty girls and tripping up Slytherins, they crossed paths with Lily, her nose in her book.

"Oh lookie here," Sirius grinned. "Is this not a pencil necked virgin I see before me?"

"I do believe it is!" James said, pretending to be surprised.

"She's standing dangerously close to a vast pool of water," Sirius commented. "For a smart girl that 'aint so smart."

"What water?" Peter asked.

"The one we're about to create," James grinned evilly as him and Sirius conjured a bucket of water and poured it all over poor Lily's head.

As the boys tore off to class, laughing their heads off.

Lily stood in the hallway, soaking wet. Her book was ruined, and her hair was a mess. She dried herself off with magic and hurried to first period Charms, but was well aware that her hair was frizzing up around her face. As she sat in her assigned seat in front of James, she could feel his stare and the tremble of his silent laugh.

"Nice look," said a smug voice.

Lily turned around, to face Hufflepuff bimbo and slut, Emmeline Vance. She was sitting on James's lap, and his hands were inside her shirt.

"Well if it isn't special needs boy and his muse, the lovely Chlamydia," Lily mocked.

"My name is Emmeline, you geek," she scoffed.

"By the way, sorry about this morning. That bucket just appeared out of nowhere," James said, as Emmeline bit his neck and stroked his chest.

Lily turned further in her seat to look at the insincere look on James Potter's face. "Oh please don't apologise, I understand. But chew on this- while outsiders such as myself rarely fit comfortably into a school environment, this, is as good as your life will get. The big Quidditch star with the vacuous girlfriend, because let's face it; the old grey matter isn't exactly top of the range. So you'll end up with a job in the ministry, with your dad, and probably married to Emmeline here. But soon you'll start drinking to numb the aching feeling you have inside. Fast forward a few years, and you're a drunk, fat depressed guy at a bar talking about the good old days. While your little wife, whose looks have steadily rotted away, is prepping up her own self esteem by indulging in sexual encounters with your friends behind your back."

"What friends?" James asked cluelessly.

"I'm guessing most of them," Lily shrugged and turned back around to listen to Professor Flitwick.

xxxxx

The last class of the day was potions. Lily leaned back against the wall before the class while listening to James and Emmeline's conversation. She almost felt sorry for him; but not quite.

"I tried on the most amazing dress for the dance," Emmeline was saying.

"Sounds hot," James said in a bored tone as she described the dress.

"I think Armani would be good for you. Stylish, yet understand. So you look good, but you don't distract attention from me," she nodded thoughtfully.

"What's Armani?" asked James cluelessly.

Thankfully for him, and all listening, Professor Slughorn called them into the dungeon. Emmeline pulled James back.

"Mr Potter, if it's not too much trouble?" Slughorn waved him into the room.

Emmeline held up a hand. "In a minute! Bye James."

They shared a long, drawn out kiss before Emmeline skipped away down the hall.

Lily rolled her eyes at the couple before taking out her Potions notes. They were making the potion for sorcery and destiny; one which could go very wrong. She needed to make sure she knew what she was doing in this one.

"MR POTTER!" Slughorn interrupted his own lecture. "Do you think I might have your attention? Or has Mr Black have something interesting to say? I'm betting on… unlikely. Ok time is sort people, I want you to pair off and start making this potion."

James and Sirius automatically moved off together, when Slughorn stopped them.

"I don't think so," he said sternly. "Mr Black you go with Mr Longbottom, and Mr Potter you go with Miss Evans."

"What?" Lily said, startled. "Oh no professor…"

"It's ok Miss Evens, I have every hope that you can keep him in line," Slughorn wandered back to his desk.

"I cannot believe I am stuck with you," Lily groaned as her and James collected their ingredients. "Let's hope I don't breathe any retard germs."

"Let's hope I don't get any pencil neck virgin disease," James shot back.

"Get stuffed!" Lily grumbled.

"Woah! That's harsh," James smirked.

"I hate you!" Lily moaned.

"That's because you secretly want to have sex with me," James whispered and winked as he set up their potion.

Lily gasped. "When I do decide to surrender the flower of my womanhood, I had always imagined it being with someone of my own species."

James scoffed. "There is no one else in your own species."

Lily threw more ingredients in at stirred furiously. "You're such a moron. You really think that the world revolves around rap music, Quidditch and hanging out with the right crowd?"

James grabbed the spoon from her. "You make me sick! You think you're so different to everyone else."

Lily grabbed it back. "Different _from_."

"What?"

"You said different _to._ The correct phraseology is different _from_," Lily corrected.

"Thanks for that information. Now I can say that you're no different _from _every geek with books instead of friends and you won't have to open your big fat mouth to correct me!" James almost shouted at her.

"Neanderthal!"

"Spaz!"

"Toad!"

"Skank!"

"You know I should pity you, but I can't! I hate you too much!" Lily threw in yet another ingredient. "I would rather cut off my legs with a rusty knife than ever be anything like you!"

"DITTO!"

Lily raised an eyebrow incredulously. "Ditto? DOUBLE DITTO!"

"Double double ditto time one thousand gazillion trillion!" James said in a self-satisfied way.

"NO NOT THAT ONE!" Lily yelled as he put in the wrong ingredient.

The potion blew up in their faces.

"OH MY MERLIN YOU'RE SUCH A RETARD!" Lily yelled as she wiped the liquid out of her eyes.

"You distracted me," James grumbled.

Slughorn cleaned it up with a wave of his wand. "Go and have a shower- both of you!"

Lily and James grumbled all the way up to Gryffindor tower to wash off the potion of sorcery and destiny.

That night, James and the other boys danced in their towels to rap music, while Lily read quietly in her bed. One by one, the lights went off, and all the Gryffindors dreamt peacefully.

**Chapter 2:**

_Ugh my head! I must be dreaming_. James thought as he climbed out of bed. Something was wrong. When he stood up, his balance was off slightly. _What was that? _Something moved. On his chest, something moved! _Tits?! _He grabbed his chest. _Oh my god I have tits. Two tits! I guess that's the regular number of tits; but for a guy! What's going on here? _He undressed quickly, and looked down. _OH MY GOD IT'S GONE! Ok, this looks bad. If it's gone and I have tits that means… _And for the first time he noticed his room. The pink curtains were shut around the equally pink bed. And the large stack of books, and the ginger cat that was sitting on the end of the bed. _This must be a dream; a very very bad 'I have tits' kind of dream. _As he found himself face to face with the mirror, he screamed. He had long red hair, large green eyes… He was Lily Evens! _Oh God this isn't a dream. Ok… just get dressed! That's not hard. _So he opened drawers one by one and found himself looking at underwear with the days of the week on it. He grabbed the blue pair and pulled them on. _Yippee, now my pubes know it's Wednesday! _Then he saw a bra. _Oh god. _He knew basically where is went so he tried his best to put it on. _It's tough enough getting these damn things off! How the hell does anyone know how to get them on?_ He threw it on the floor in anger. _It looks like I'm going au natural today._

xxxxx

_Something isn't right_. Lily knew that much when she woke up at 7am the next morning. The alarm sound was different, her bed felt different. Something was definitely wrong. _What is this? _There was something making the sheets stick up. She stood up in a rush- and found herself staring into the mirror. She screamed.

"What's the matter prongs?" came a sleepy voice.

She just stared at him.

"Hey can you put your boner away? None of us really want to see that," Remus said and wrinkled his nose.

"Sorry," she muttered in James Potter's voice and closed the blinds with her _HIS _wand.

_GO AWAY! _She hit her… his… dick with the wand. _GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY!_ Finally she gave up and got dressed. Thank god for robes. She joined the boys as they went down to the great hall for breakfast.

xxxxx

James looked mournfully where his body was sitting with his friends, and went to Lily's usual spot at the end of the table.

"You're late this morning," Alice commented. "I got your breakfast ready for you."

James looked as his bowl of oatmeal. "Not hungry, gotta go."

"Nonsense!" Frank said as Alice laughed. "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day!"

"Oatmeal is wonderful for promoting regular and healthy bowel movements," Alice said, eating her own oatmeal.

"That's cool I already took a dump the size of my own head," James mumbled.

"Excuse me?!" Frank and Alice said together, shocked.

"Oatmeal's good?" James said carefully, and spooned it into his mouth. "Jesus people eat puke?!" He spat it out and took a big swig of pumpkin juice.

As Alice and Frank giggled and whispered into each other's ears, James poured the oats under the table. He looked up to the other end, where Lily was 'enjoying' his big plate of protein.

xxxxx

"Is this meat?" Lily asked as Sirius piled bacon, eggs and toast onto her plate. "Can I have oatmeal?"

"Are you shitting me?" Sirius laughed. "Seriously what's with you today?"

"Not hungry," Lily mumbled but picked up a piece of oily bacon and put it in her mouth. She felt sick, this was disgusting.

"Eat up Prongs! Get nice and strong!" Sirius said happily, and him, Remus and Peter all watched as she choked down the dead pig.

She couldn't take it anymore, and raced out of the hall to throw up into a suit of armour.

xxxxx

Lily stood outside the History of Magic classroom, pretending to listen to what Remus was saying, when James (in HER body) grabbed her robes and dragged her away from the class.

"What have you done to me?" He said in her voice, glaring and pulling on her clothes.

"Let go of me you big bully," Lily pushed him away. "You think I'm responsible for this?"

"Well I certainly am not! You're the one who always knows everything," James rolled his (HER) eyes.

"That does not include this!" Lily huffed. "This is impossible! This cannot happen!"

"Well it's happening ok?" James ran his hand through his long hair. It just wasn't the same. "You better figure out how to get my damn body back…"

"Trust me there is nothing I'd like more," Lily hissed. "You I think I relish waking up to the day with the marauders?"

"Leave my mates out of this would you?" James said protectively.

Lily felt tears sting her eyes. "I don't wanna be a boy. Especially not you!"

"No no no no no no! Don't cry, people can see!" James whispered. "Look maybe it's one of those 24 hour things, like a head cold. Tomorrow we could be back to normal. We just have to get through the day. Try not to attract any unnecessary attention."

He turned on his small heel and stormed into class, followed meekly by Lily. James sat down at the front of the room, and Lily awkwardly sat next to Emmeline, _her girlfriend!_

"Your homework was to prepare a speech on the greatest living witch or wizard," Professor Binns said as they all sat down. "Miss Vance?"

"I'm sorry sir, but I was excused homework due to Quidditch practise," Emmeline smirked, touching Lily's leg lightly, making her flinch.

_Emmeline isn't even on the Hufflepuff Quidditch team. What a slut._

"Alright. Miss Evens? Miss Evens? LILY EVENS?"

"Oh right, that's me," James stood up quickly.

"You're speech?"

"I think… the greatest living wizard is…Myron Wagtail," James said. "He's the lead singer of the weird sisters."

"Why do you think that?" Professor Binns asked in surprise.

"The thing about Myron is… he's from the streets. He's a muggle born, and his parents died. And now he's all famous and stuff, and inspired a lot of magical people to like music. I think that's pretty great. Oh, and, he's a wizard, and alive," James sat down with a smile on his face.

Lily's head fell onto her hands. This was a nightmare.

xxxxx

"You said Myron Wagtail?" Lily hissed at James as they left the class.

"Pretty good huh?" He grinned. "It just flew right into my head."

"At least there is plenty of space for it to land!" She mocked. "You made a complete fool out of me in there!"

James just smirked at started to walk away.

"James Potter you're an idiot and a philistine!" Lily called out.

"You know what? I don't appreciate you calling me an idiot. I don't know what that other thing is, but I sure as hell am not one of them either," James stalked off.

At lunch, Lily walked slowly into the men's bathroom. This was gross. This was very very gross. _Ew I have to touch it? _She realised that as she sat on the toilet. _I will never eat finger food from a buffet again for as long as I live!_

She joined the other marauders for lunch, and sighed miserably as they shouted to each other about Quidditch and hot girls. All Lily could think was _dear God, I have to eat with these creatures! _Her thoughts were interrupted as she felt something kiss her neck.

"Hey James, the girls are going out tonight, so I thought maybe you'd want to come to Hufflepuff to discuss what you want to wear for the dance?" Emmeline said softly.

"I have things to do," Lily frowned and tried to push the other girl away.

"Ok," Emmeline said impatiently. "What I meant was we'd be alone… So maybe I might do that thing where I…" She proceeded to whisper in Lily's ear exactly what she'd do.

Lily knocked her lunch to the ground in shock. "You filthy little slut! You'd do that?" She stormed off through the hall, ignoring the stares. As she left she heard Emmeline say loudly: "Last week he begged me to do that."

xxxxx

James watched as Lily humiliated his girlfriend, and left his untouched lunch to wander by the Hufflepuff table, where Emmeline sat with her friends (which included Sirius's girlfriend).

"I can't believe James turned down the chance to have sex with me tonight. Am I in like bizarro world?" Emmeline was saying.

"If I had Remus Lupin sniffing around me, I wouldn't be wasting my time on James," one of her bimbos said dreamily.

James tried not to laugh.

"It's not that simple! Today he's football captain, tomorrow, Quidditch man of the year. Sports are celebrity! We need to plan these things!" Emmeline banged her hand on the table.

"I'd be relieved if Sirius didn't want to have sex," Chanel sighed. "Sometimes I think that's the only reason he's with me."

"That's so not true Chanel. You have many fine qualities," Emmeline promised.

James walked away at this point. _GIRLS! Who understands them?_

xxxxx

Lily walked awkwardly beside Sirius down to the next class after lunch.

"We've got an extra practise tonight, don't forget," Sirius was saying.

"Practise?" Lily said, startled.

"Yeah! I'm the mood to kick some serious ass," Sirius grinned.

"Oh, yeah me too… Only I have a prior engagement that conflicts with the whole… ass-kicking thing."

Sirius stopped in his tracks. "We're a week away from the game against Slytherin. Do you know what the coach will do to your nuts if you don't show up tonight? I'll tell you! He will grind them into dust! Nut dust! And the only kids you'll be able to have are itty bitty powder ones."

"Ok ok I'll be there," Lily rolled her eyes at Sirius's exaggeration.

She saw her body walking ahead of her so she ran up to talk to James.

"What am I going to do about Quidditch tonight? I haven't been on a broom since first year," Lily hissed at him.

James stopped to look at her. "Oh merlin. I didn't even think… there's nothing you can do! Just… do you best."

So that afternoon, Lily walked with a sense of dread to the Quidditch field where she hopped onto a broom and tried to remember how to fly. She rose unsteadily into the air and breathed heavily. _Ok, I can do this. Point forward… _someone threw the quaffle to her and she yelped and missed it.

"Potter! What are you doing?" Called the coach.

"Sorry," she muttered. "Never played a game before in my life."

She continued to miss the quaffle five more times until she caught it, and was so surprised that she dropped in immediately.

"WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING OUT THERE!?" Coach shouted in the change rooms an hour later.

"I'm feeling a little peaky," Lily said defensively.

"Peaky?"

"Yeah, it means off-colour…"

"YEAH I KNOW WHAT PEAKY MEANS! THIS GAME IS THE BIGGEST DAY IN THESE BOYS AND GIRLS LIVES. YOU GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER DO YOU HEAR ME?"

"Yes coach," Lily said, startled. People really took Quidditch way too seriously.

Lily sat down and ruffled her hair anxiously. _I really am becoming like James…_

"Hey Prongs, listen to me," Sirius said. "You've just hit a rough spot, it's probably nerves." He dropped his towel, and stood completely naked in front of Lily.

"Yeah you're right," she couldn't keep her eyes of his… thing. _Why won't he put it away?_

"You wanna touch the lucky quaffle?" Sirius asked. "Works every time remember!"

"Yeah sure…" Lily reached out and rubbed the red ball Sirius held in front of her.

_I'm going mad I swear. _

xxxxx

The next morning, they were both still in the wrong bodies, and neither of them were very happy about it.

Lily decided that if she had to be James Potter, she might as well make the most of it. When she dressed this morning, she found the only pair of trousers that were ironed properly, and buttoned her school top all the way up, and tied her tie tightly around her neck. Her shoes were shined, and her hair combed. She actually looked presentable in James Potter's body.

Of course, when James saw her in the common room he roughly grabbed her and pulled her aside.

"I heard about Quidditch practise," James said. "My life is over if coach drops me."

"It's just a game," Lily rolled her eyes.

"It's not just a game, it's Quidditch! Don't you get anything?" He said angrily.

"I get that whatever this is it isn't a head cold," Lily said, arms crossed defensively.

"Do you have any better theories? Oh shit, what am I wearing?" James suddenly realised her appearance.

"Robes?"

"My hair! You've made it all dorky!" James gasped.

"Excuse me for taking some pride in your appearance!" Lily said with a small smile.

"You're going to ruin my life! I look like male version of you!"

"Well as long as I'm stuck inside this disgusting body, I may as well make the most of it," Lily shrugged.

"Alright! If that's the way you want it!" James stormed off.

xxxxx

Lily got her own back. James showed up for breakfast the next day with a skirt that had obviously been cut (way past her knees where it should be), a white shirt showed the black bra underneath (James spent hours practising putting it on), and high heels.

The boys whistled appreciatively, and the girls whispered in jealousy. Lily jumped up from the table and tried to cover her legs with her jacket.

"What are you doing?" James pushed her away.

"Protecting your modesty! You look like a common prostitute!" Lily said in shock.

"Damn I was going for high class hooker," he said with a smirk.

"You can't walk into school like this!" Lily argued.

"I can do whatever I want. Now get your hands off me or I'll scream," James threatened and sat down with Alice, who stared in shock at her friend.

At all meals today, Lily watched mournfully as James abandoned the healthy food and literally poured mayonnaise into his bacon filled mouth. The guys at the table watched in fascination, and the girls with horror. Lily felt sick just watching.

Lily gritted her teeth and stood up on the Gryffindor table and started stripping.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET DOWN NOW!" McGonagall called out in anger.

Lily looked at Dumbledore and saw him chuckling. She had a feeling he knew what was happening.

In the bathrooms later that day, Lily complimented as many dicks as she could. Hopefully James now had a gay reputation.

Xxxxx

As she walked back to the common room from dinner, James overheard Emmeline and her two blonde sidekicks whispering about Lily- or him technically.

"She's totally pretending to be pretty," Emmeline scoffed. "You either are pretty or you're not."

Lily walked up to Emmeline. "Hello Emmeline."

She gave her boyfriend's body a cold stare. "Hello James."

"I have something I'd like to say to you," Lily tried to keep the smirk off her face.

"Let me guess. You're sorry about blowing me off," Emmeline flipped her hair and rolled her eyes.

"No. I'm afraid we can't see each other anymore," Lily said.

James watched in horror as the scene played out in front of him.

"Very funny James," Emmeline giggled and kissed her cheek.

"I just don't find you that attractive anymore," Lily shrugged.

"WHAT?" Emmeline, Chanel and Tiffany all screamed at the same time.

"You just look kind of plain," Lily started to walk off. "And don't worry about your moustache; some guys are really into that shit."

Lily strutted off in a perfect imitation of James, and was immediately slammed into the wall by her body.

"What just happened," James said in a low voice.

"You and your girlfriend just broke up," she grinned.

"NO! ME AND EMMELINE?"

"You'll get over it," Lily shrugged.

James took a few steps back and then smiled in a scarily calm way. "I have to go. Tonight's a big night for me. You too."

"What?" Lily asked, confused.

"Congratulations, tonight is the night you finally get to lose it!" he made a popping sound with his cheek and ran off before she could say anything.

xxxxx

James sat in the room of requirement, on the couch with Amos Diggory. He was a Hufflepuff, who was basically the male version of Emmeline. Amos handed him a butterbeer which he downed in a second. _If I have to have sex with a guy, I better be drunk. _

"I've never seen a chick drink like that before," he said in awe.

"My throat's a little dry," James burped.

"Maybe I could…" Amos moved over to the couch and crawled slowly towards him. "Moisten in up a little." His tongue moved out of his mouth in James's face.

"I need another beer," James said quickly. He was nowhere near tipsy enough for this.

"Sure," Amos moved off him.

James finished his second beer, and Amos tried to kiss him again.

"Not here," James said quickly. "Let's go to the bedroom." He pointed off vaguely.

Amos ran into the room. "Let's get cracking baby, coz daddy's packing!"

_What was I thinking? This is so GAY! _James watched in horror as Amos undressed.

"What you waiting for baby? Daddy wants to see some flesh," he winked.

_He's going to make me his bitch! I'll be James the bitch boy._

"I have to pee," James said quickly.

"NOW?"

"Yeah, you get undressed and don't start without me!" With that, James ran for his life out of the room of requirement and all the way back to Gryffindor tower.

xxxxx

The entire night was a nightmare for Lily. She sat on her bed with her homework, not taking any of it in.

"Are you ok," Sirius sat down on the edge of her bed. "You've been acting kind of weird lately."

"I'm fine thank you," Lily said stiffly.

"I think I know what's on your mind," Sirius continued. "If you don't impress those scouts then you're going to end up working at the ministry."

Lily shrugged, not sure what to say.

"Let things fall into place," Sirius advised. "Whatever you do, I'll still be your best mate and brother ok?"

Lily nodded, tears coming into her eyes. She didn't have anyone to say that to her. James was luckier than he knew. And all she could think was: _am I losing my virginity right now?_

Xxxxx

At breakfast the next day, Lily heard the whispers. She knew what it meant. She spent the whole next two lessons crying the bathrooms. Not even moaning Myrtle cared.

James ignored the whispers and stares that followed him wherever he went the next day. He ran into Lily who was sitting the hallway, looking at the graffiti on the wall. He saw her tear stained face, and the hatred in her eyes.

"Look, don't worry about it. You had a great time," James lied. "Trust me, I'll never forget it."

"How could you do this to me," Lily whispered.

"What? I know he isn't the best looking guy in the world, but hey, it's only sex!" James shrugged and stood directly in front of her.

"I wanted it to be special," Lily sniffed.

"YOU STARTED IT!" James lost his temper. He hated to admit it, but he felt guilty for the trick he played after seeing her heartbroken face. Thank god he hadn't gone through with it. "You lost me my girlfriend!"

"I was saving it for the boy I fell in love with," Lily stood up and wiped her eyes furiously.

James scoffed but watched carefully as Lily struggled to keep a composed face. "Look nothing happened ok," he said finally.

"Really?" Lily smiled softly.

"Really."

"That's not what Amos is telling everyone," Lily said miserably.

"Well Amos is a liar!"

"Try telling that to the entire world," Lily gestured to the graffiti. It read 'Lily Evans is slut stuff'. "How does it feel being a cheap little slut?"

James looked at the wall before catching her eye. "It looks like I'm going to have to talk to that son of a bitch because nobody calls us a slut."

James walked off down the hall the Lily closely behind him. They eventually found Amos in the great hall with about half the school and a few teachers. Whistles and stares followed James as he went straight up to Amos and grabbed the back of his neck. Amos stood up to face him, with a sick little grin on his face.

"You found me babe," he winked at James.

"What the hell did you say?" James poked his chest.

"Nothing," Amos smirked. "Nothing that wasn't 100 percent true."

"You're a greasy scumbag liar," James growled.

"And you've got a very, dirty, little mouth," Amos flicked his tongue out in what was meant to be a suggestive way. "But then again, I already knew that!"

"YOU ASSHOLE!" James went to punch him but was easily deflected by the bigger guy.

And then Lily was there, and she knocked Amos onto the ground and kneed him in the balls, fist flying into his face. "That's no way to treat a lady! Why don't you tell everyone what really happened? HUH?"

"Nothing happened," Amos cried.

"I think you owe this sweet, innocent, but still very attractive lady an apology," Lily said.

"I'm sorry!" Amos shouted.

"Thanks," James said loftily.

Xxxxx

James showed Lily where the kitchens were, and they laughed together while eating sandwiches.

"It's so much fun to hit someone! I want to go back and hit him again!" Lily said enthusiastically.

"Doesn't mean I forgive you for screwing up my relationship with Emmeline," James reminded her.

"I'll try and fix things," Lily offered.

"What's point?" James picked at his sandwich crusts. "I'm a girl remember? What are we going to do?"

"It's a complete disaster," Lily agreed.

"What were we doing before this happened?" He said thoughtfully.

"Arguing," Lily laughed and took a bite of her pickles and cheese.

"We always argue," James rolled his eyes.

"We stuffed up that sorcery potion…" Lily said thoughtfully.

"NO!" they said together.

"You think that the potion spilled on us and switched us around?" James asked.

"Maybe! Let's go see Slughorn!"

So they left the kitchens together and went to the dungeons, where Slughorn was merrily cleaning up from the last class of the day.

"What can I do for you? Anything for my favourite student," he winked at James in Lily's body.

"Ew," James said under his breath, making Lily elbow him.

"Sir I had a question about that sorcery potion?" James asked.

"Fire away!"

"What can happen if it goes wrong?"

"Well… it can read a person's destinies and use them to change a person," Slughorn said thoughtfully.

James and Lily shared a startled look.

"I'm going to tell him," Lily said.

"No! Are you crazy?" James snapped.

"HE CAN HELP YOU MORON!"

Slughorn looked cluelessly between the two teenagers.

"Sir, I'm Lily Evens."

"Goodness me! You mean to tell me that after the potion landed on you two, you switched bodies?" He gasped.

They nodded meekly.

"Can anything be done?" James asked hopefully.

"I can mix up an antidote, but it will take probably a week," Slughorn said.

"A week? But the Quidditch final is next week!" James gasped.

"I have my Oxford interview!" Lily moaned.

"I'm sorry kids, but it's the best I can do," Slughorn said.

Xxxxx

Back in the Gryffindor common room, Lily was glaring at the floor and James looked lost.

"I had my heart set on Oxford," Lily muttered.

"I don't want to work at the ministry!" James moaned.

Suddenly, James sat up straight. "You beat up Amos."

"So?"

"You have my body! My strength! I just have to show you how to use it!" James grinned.

"Ok," Lily said slowly. "And we can study so you can get through my interview!"

James made a face but they shook hands and grinned.

So James had Lily up in the air, trying to throw the quaffle through the hoops. She was absolutely hopeless. She missed everyone. She fell of her broom so many times she doubted there was space on her body left unbruised. He taught Lily the theory of Quidditch and the moves, all the rules, and her job as a chaser.

In return, James spent a few hours after dinner with Lily in the boy's dorm, reading her favourite books and poems, as she talked him through the old language and hidden meanings.

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?" Lily read from her favourite poem. "Thou art more lovely and temperate. Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, and summer's lease hath all too short a date."

"So," James paused thoughtfully. "He's not saying that she's like a summer's day, he's saying that she's _hot _like a summer's day."

"Yeah that's it!" Lily grinned in triumph.

"I still can't imagine ever saying that to a girl," James said.

"Maybe you just have to meet the right person to say it to," Lily said. _Like me!_

"See you tomorrow then," James left the room with a wink, and grinned as the rest of the marauders traipsed into the dorm with a surprised look at Lily's body.

"You've sure been hanging out a lot with her lately," Sirius commented.

"She's not that bad," Lily smiled secretively and lay down in her bed.

Xxxxx

James was skipping to breakfast alone, in a surprisingly good mood, when he saw Emmeline's friend Chanel sitting on the floor, crying softly. _Oh god, she's crying._

"Chanel?" he asked. "You ok?"

"No," she stuttered.

_Oh crap._

He sat down awkwardly beside her. "What's wrong?"

"It's Sirius. He's seeing some other girl," she cried.

"No, he wouldn't do that," James looked away. Sirius would do exactly that and they both knew it.

"Then how come I saw him with his tongue stuck down her throat?" Chanel said.

"Ah. Did you see who it was?" _Please say no please say no…_

"No they were in a broom closet. But I heard what they were doing clear enough! Why are guys such jerks?" She wiped her face on her sleeve. "Why am I asking you right?" She said when James didn't answer. "You know less about guys than anyone on the planet."

James nodded slowly.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that, I'm sorry," Chanel said softly.

"What do I know about guys?" James asked rhetorically. _If only she knew…_

"I'm so stupid!" Chanel said loudly. "I know what Sirius is like!"

"Then why do you go out with him?" James asked simply.

Chanel looked at him like he was crazy. "When I started at Hogwarts, I felt like I was invisible! Then I started dating Sirius and I became friends with Emmeline, Tiffany, James and everyone; and then people started to notice me! And I liked that! I guess I was just afraid of feeling invisible again," she let out a fresh wave of sobs.

"You know, I think a lot more people feel that way then you realise?" James said, thinking of whose body he was in.

"You don't. You go your own way no matter what anybody thinks. I admire you Lily," she admitted.

James smiled at the other girl, secretly feeling proud of Lily. Not that he'd ever admit it.

And somehow, he ended up in the Hufflepuff girl's dorm for a sleepover with his ex-girlfriend, Chanel and Tiffany.

As he walked in, Emmeline jumped up and ran to Chanel. "Why did you invite that pencil neck to our sleepover?" she hissed.

"Lily's ok. She just wants to hang. Right Lily?" Chanel asked.

"Oh yeah," James agreed. "I can't wait until we all get into our jammies."

"I guess," Emmeline said carefully. "I see you've finally seen the error of your geekish ways."

"Oh I have," James assured her. "This girl just wants to have fun."

"Ok!" Emmeline jumped up and down in excitement. "Let's all get into our PJ's!"

_Wow Emmeline really was a bimbo! Maybe it's a good thing Lily dumped her._

The girls squealed at started to undress. _Oh man, life is such a bitch! _James closed the door to the room.

As the four girls (James counted as a girl) lay on the floor reading _Witch Weekly _and painting each other's nails, James turned to his ex-girlfriend.

"So you're not seeing James Potter anymore?" he asked, though he knew the answer.

"Ugh," she crinkled her nose. "That is so over."

"You guys were like the perfect couple," Chanel sighed miserably.

"I was only seeing him because he's Quidditch captain! Without me, he's just another dumb jock with his head in his shorts. Which is convenient, because there is not much else going on down there if you know what I mean," she giggled in a high pitch tone.

James tried not to glare at the dumb blonde.

"Lily," Emmeline said suddenly. "I couldn't help but notice that you're a little on the bristly side… down below."

"You've got sort of a… rainforest thing going on," Tiffany said unhelpfully.

"It's not meant to be bushy?" James asked.

They all shook their heads.

"We've all gone totally Latino," Emmeline said.

"You should too," Chanel told him.

"We can do it for you right now!" Emmeline said.

James thought about it. He couldn't see why not. "Let's do it!"

They all squealed.

"Ok girls! We have a green light on the brazilin! Tiffany, bring me scissors and depilatory strips! Chanel, towels and hot water; LOTS OF IT!" Emmeline commanded. "Lily, lie back and relax, and do exactly as I say!" She pushed James onto the bed and pulled off his pyjama pants. "Bite down on this," she put a piece of cloth in James's mouth.

As they ripped the wax off, James let out a loud scream into the cloth. It was the most painful thing he'd felt in his life. He had a whole new respect for girls.

Xxxxx

Lily had somehow let Sirius con her into sneaking into Hogsmeade under James's invisibility cloak. Apparently they were going to a party in the three broomsticks, where there would be free firewhiskey. Lily was very astounded to find out the marauder's secrets- the cloak and the map of Hogwarts they had invented. She was actually quite impressed with the magic involved, not that she'd ever admit it.

She stopped worrying about getting caught as her and her 'best mate' walked into the pub.

"Check out the ass on that blonde!" Sirius whistled.

"What about Chanel?" Lily asked, confused.

Sirius looked behind him. "Don't see her."

"Think about it Padfoot," Lily had taken to using the marauder's nicknames. "Are you willing to risk the love a good women for the cheap tawdry of a one-night stand?"

Sirius burst out laughing. "You crack me up. You were always into the faithful thing, but I'm a Black. And the pure-blood extremists know no such boundaries."

Lily couldn't help the smile that spread across her face at the knowledge that James was faithful.

"You better hope we get ourselves some ladies tonight my man, or I'll end up drunk off my face with you on some dark street telling you I love you! And neither of us wants that to happen! Let's party," Sirius stormed further into the crowd of people.

As the night went on, Sirius fed her drink after drink. The first few burnt her throat and made her cough, but they got easier the more they came. Soon, half the pub was surrounding her yelling "CHUG CHUG CHUG!" She asked for more and more and more until somehow, her and Sirius were stumbling back to Hogwarts, arms around each other's shoulders.

"Did I say I love you man?" Sirius slurred, as Lily sung a muggle song. "I really do love you man. You're like my twin brother!"

And somehow, Lily ended up in her bed, with James in her body sitting over her, feeding her milk.

"How are you feeling?" He asked her.

"A little better," she said, though her head still felt like there was elephants in it.

"How much did you drink last night?" James asked, his hand on her knee.

Lily shrugged. "I don't know. I just remember feeling unusually happy, and having a really good time, and then it's like someone picked up the room at started spinning it."

"Think of it as a rite of passage," James grinned. "Just go easy next time ok?"

James's hazel eyes met Lily's green ones, even if they were the other way around.

"Thanks for taking care of me," Lily said softly.

James held her gaze for another few seconds before standing up. "See you after lunch? We have stuff to do today."

Lily nodded and closed her eyes.

Xxxxx

They were out on the Quidditch field and Lily was starting to get the hang of it. To really get the movements properly, she sat on the back of James's broom and held his wrist while he threw the Quaffle.

"What is that?" James stopped. "What's sticking in my ass?"

Lily looked down. "Oh, sorry. It's not my fault I'm sorry! It's your thing not mine!"

"But you're behind the wheel, I guess that means you find me attractive," James turned around and grinned at her.

"Actually it means you find me attractive," Lily giggled. "But let's not read too much into it. Let's just play Quidditch."

"Sure," he turned around again. "As long as you can keep my dick out of your butt."

Lily rolled her eyes, but he couldn't see.

They spent the entire afternoon together, and flew high into the sky to watch the sun set. It was very romantic, and Lily blushed when she thought of what had happened earlier. She didn't like to admit it, but James Potter wasn't as bad as she had thought.

After dinner, Lily snuck into the girl's dorms.

"Hey!" James said. "I'm trying to decide what to wear for your interview."

"Navy suit, white blouse and sensible shoes," Lily said immediately.

"Not something a little hotter," James asked.

"This is an interview…" she started angrily, but trailed off. "You're joking!"

He chuckled. "At least now you can tell." He put away the clothes he had taken out. "I've been thinking, since we're stuck like this for a little while longer, why don't we go to that dance together? It wouldn't be a date…"

"I'd like that?" Lily smiled.

"Great!" James said. "It's a date! Not a date date… though…"

Lily grinned and agreed.

Xxxxx

"I never see you anymore," Alice complained to James as they got ready for bed that night.

"Sorry, I've been studying with James," James said, trying not to laugh.

Alice huffed and rolled her eyes.

"You got a problem with that?" James raised an eyebrow.

"No…" Alice started. "If you want to waste your valuable time, that's your choice."

"Who says I'm wasting my time?" James asked, annoyed.

"He's stupid, trouble and a loser. You told me so yourself!" Alice said. "There's nothing you can do to change that."

James mumbled something about going for a walk, and stormed out of the dorm.

He found himself on the Quidditch pitch, throwing the Quaffle in the air and catching it over and over again.

Lily found him lying on his back in the grass, letting his, or her, long read hair get soaked in the rain that had started pouring.

"What are you doing?" She lay down beside him.

"This is who I am," he looked at the hoops and the Quidditch pitch. "It's all I've ever been. And now I'm not even that. I'm _you_."

"Quidditch isn't who you are," Lily said. She didn't know what to say to that last part.

"You don't get it do you? People like you never do," James sighed.

"What do people like me not get?" Lily asked, trying to keep her voice calm.

"PEOPLE LIKE ME!" He shouted at her.

She flinched. "What do you mean?"

"I will never get an Oxford Education," he said. "I want to be muggle born, so I don't have to work for the shitty ministry, and the only job I can get that's not is flying around on a broom."

"Is this about the interview? It's ok to be nervous!" Lily said.

"Nothing is ok!" he ran his hands through his hair, pulling out grass. "Tomorrow I'm supposed to be playing the most important game of my life! It's my destiny! Mine! Not yours! I'm not supposed to be attending some interview at a college in a world I don't belong in!"

Lily took his hand. "So we've got the wrong lives. But sometimes you've just got to get on with life. Let things fall into place."

"Save your inspirational speeches for someone who gives a damn," James dropped her hand and stood up.

"I never took you for a quitter," Lily called as he ran back into the castle, leaving her in the downpour.

And as they sat on their separate beds that night, they both felt the same sense of despair and loneliness.

Xxxxx

James left Hogwarts after breakfast the next day with Lily's mother, and the documents Professor Dumbledore had given him. The twinkle in Dumbledore's eye that blinked at him as he was sent off told him Dumbledore knew exactly who he was.

Lily's mother hugged him as he walked into the interview room, and sat in front of an old fat guy.

"One of the qualities we hope for in any Oxford student," the man began, "is their passion. You're test results are exemplary, but your love and knowledge of literature is rare in a person of your years."

_Lily really is incredible. _"Thank you sir, it's an important part of my life," James said, hoping he sounded convincing. He thought of Lily playing his Quidditch game, and he really hoped he could get into university for the little read head that had his body.

"Go on," he urged.

"Poetry, for instance," James started. "I like the way it can articulate and express feelings; complicated and difficult feelings that you explain literally." He spoke the lines that Lily had drilled into him over the past week. They all meant nothing to him.

"What about modern literature?" he asked. "Are there any contemporary writers or poets that you particularly admire?"

Lily hadn't prepared him for this! The only time she had spoken of modern authors, she had wrinkled her nose. "No," James said. "Not really."

"Why is that?"

James remembered what Lily had said. "Because they suck?"

"Oh," James saw the disappointment on the man's face, and realised he had screwed up. "Surely if modern poetry is irrelevant, and poets and their art form are doomed to extinction."

James shrugged, having zero ideas about what to say now.

"I think that will be all," the man sighed.

James stood to leave, when he was struck with sudden inspiration. "Actually, there is one modern poet that I like."

"Oh?"

"Myron Wagtail," James said with finality.

"I do not believe I've heard of this person," the man said, surprised.

James proceeded to sing his favourite weird sisters song.

"I am not familiar with that work," he said carefully.

"It's rap music sir!"

"You believe this to be poetry?" He said in surprise.

"Definitely!" This was something James knew how to talk about. "They talk about their lives, their experiences and they can be very brutal! But often undercut with dark humour as well. It takes real talent to compose something such as this."

James was proud to see an impressed look on the man's face.

He left the interview feeling quite good about it.

Xxxxx

The game had started. The whole school, plus the scouts, were there to see Lily's final test. Her hands were shaking, and she tried to remember everything James had taught her over the last few days. She flew this way and that, trying to get herself in the line of the quaffle, but it was moving too fast for her to get anywhere in time. She stopped in mid-air as she saw James arrive in the stands. She waited a second too long and got hit with a bludger.

_Ow! _They both thought at the same time.

"You messed with the wrong girl," Lily muttered and flew farther down the pitch.

James sat up in the stand with Sirius, Remus and Peter.

"Hi," he said.

"Hey Lily," Remus said, eyes still on the players. "I didn't know football was your bag."

"Uh yeah. I just came to cheer on the team," James watched Lily flying aimlessly.

"Yeah we're not doing too well," Sirius sighed.

But just as he said that, Lily caught the Quaffle. She flew straight for the goalpost, swerving out of the way of Slytherins, pulled off a spectacular spin in the air, threw the ball as hard as she could… AND SCORED!

James screamed and hugged Sirius, who looked at him with a startled expression.

Slytherin was far ahead of them, but Gryffindor would win if they could catch the snitch now. Lily saw her seeker take a dive, and saw the sparkly gold ball flying ahead. She watched in slow motion as the Slytherin beater aim a bludger at the seeker, and Lily flew as fast as she could and blocked the bludger, taking a hit to the shoulder.

"POTTER TAKES A BLUDGER FOR GRYFFINDOR SEEKER," the commentator roared. "AND IT PAYS OFF! GRYFFINDOR HAS CAUGHT THE SNITCH! THEY WIN!"

Lily landed on the ground, her shoulder aching but happier than she'd ever been. The team hugged her and carried her into the change rooms, holding the Quidditch cup and cheering.

"What are you waiting here for?" Remus asked James with a smile.

James raced off to find his girl.

Lily stood outside the change rooms, hoping James would come and find her, when a young man walked up with a grin.

"Great game son," he clapped her on the shoulder (not the sore one).

"Thanks," Lily smiled.

"Ever considered playing Quidditch for England?"

Lily gaped. She'd done it! She'd fulfilled James's dream!

"Listen, as soon as you graduate, look me up! I'd be happy to have you on the team," the man said, giving her the thumbs up and walking away.

At this point, James ran up and threw his arms around her.

"MERLIN YOU WERE AMAZING! I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT," James screamed.

Lily handed him the card the man had just given her. "How do you feel about playing Quidditch for England?"

James screamed again and hugged her tightly.

"The best part was that I totally loved it! I mean your adrenaline gets pumping and the crowd was into it…" Lily trailed off at the look on James's face. "Oh god, the interview. How was it?"

"Amazing," James said quietly. "For a moment, I really felt like a part of it. I gave it my best shot."

"That's all anyone can ask," Lily smiled.

Slughorn ran up to the two of them. "I have the potion ready. Do you want to take it now?"

They both nodded eagerly.

Slughorn handed them each a vial of clear liquid.

"Wait," Lily said. "Before we take this, I just want to say something. If I have to spend my life as someone else, I'd be honoured to be you."

"Ditto," James nudged her affectionately.

"Double ditto," Lily grinned and they knocked back the potion.

The change was instantaneous. They both felt it immediately.

The team charged out of the change rooms and grabbed James and pulled him inside, leaving Lily standing alone with Slughorn.

"Great job out there," the potions master winked and walked off merrily.

Lily ran into the change room to find James, but stopped cold when she saw him sucking faces with Emmeline. _I guess he wasn't that difference after all._

xxxxx

The next night was the dance that Lily and James were meant to be going to together. However, a few hours before hand, Lily was lying on her bed in sweat pants and a tank top. Alice was at the door, talking to James who was insisting on speaking with Lily.

"She isn't going to the dance!" Alice almost shouted. "But she says have a good time with Emmeline Vance." She went to close the door in his face but stopped. "For just one moment James, I thought you'd changed." She slammed the door.

Alice sat down next to Lily on the bed. "You've got everything you've ever wanted. Don't let Potter ruin it now."

Lily looked at the letter siting on her table. James had done it. She was going to Oxford. So why didn't she feel happier?

xxxxx

James stood on the dance floor, feeling quite miserable. He kept waiting for Lily to walk through the doors into the great hall. Instead, Emmeline walked up wearing a ridiculous dress.

"Do you like it," she twirled for him.

"Yeah you look nice," James said distractedly.

She came up to whisper in his ear. "It's so tight it shows everything. I had to leave my panties off."

"Let's hope you don't get diarrhoea then," James walked away, unable to take any more of her shallowness. She stood rooted to the spot, a confused look on her face.

Xxxxx

Sirius and Chanel walked hand in hand down the hallway to the dance.

"Do you like my dress?" Chanel asked.

"Yeah, it looks good baby," Sirius checked her out.

She suddenly noticed something hanging out of his pocket. Upon careful inspection, she realised it was a white lace thong.

Chanel couldn't take this anymore. She had to get revenge on her unfaithful boyfriend.

"Seeing you in your dress robes is making me feel kind of horny," she stopped her boyfriend walking. "Let's do it in a broom closet."

"Now?" Sirius looked taken aback.

"Yeah, no one will know where we are. It'll be hot," Chanel promised.

"Ok," Sirius grinned and grabbed her hand to head for the nearest closet.

"No. You go inside, and get undressed. And then, I'll wander by in a few minutes and it'll be like I just found you that way," Chanel said seductively.

"Sounds good to me!" Sirius stripped quickly and locked himself in the closet.

Chanel wiped the smile off her face and grabbed Sirius's clothes. "Goodbye Black," she said in a cold voice, chucked his clothes out the window and ran for her life down to the dance.

Xxxxx

Alice was ready to go, Frank was at the door. Lily was still in her sweat pants.

"Lily," Alice said sympathetically. "I know I can't convince you to go. But I've got you a dress; it's hanging in the closet. Use whatever makeup of mine you want. Find James, and fight for him. That's my advice." And then she left.

Lily lay there alone for a few minutes, but realized that Alice was right. She wanted James, and she had to fight for him.

So she slipped on the emerald green gown, and curled her hair with magic. She applied a light coat of makeup and then walked out the door, ready to find the boy she once hated, but now loved.

Xxxxx

James was slow dancing with Emmeline, and the blonde hair that was getting in his face should have been red. He looked over her shoulder, and saw Lily entering the hall. A lot of people gasped, and he could see why. Geeky little Lily looked more like a princess than any other girl in the room.

He dropped Emmeline without even thinking and walked over to her. He knew what he had to do.

She smiled sweetly at him as he took her hand.

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?" he started, trying to remember. "Thou art more lovely and temperate… rough winds… blah blah blah there is something in there."

Lily giggled and couldn't look away from his hazel eyes.

"I'm sorry," he brushed her cheek with his hand. "I'm no Shakespeare. I really wish I had the most perfect and beautiful words in the world to say to you because if I did I'd say them. I'd tell you how great you make me feel when I'm with you, and how I love that little thing you do with your nose when you smile. I even love that you correct my stupid grammar. Most of all, I'd tell you that you make me a better person. My own person. And that's why I know that this," he gestured to the people in the hall who were watching with wide eyes. "means nothing. And you mean everything. But hey, I'm just a stupid Quidditch player. I don't have the right words."

"Those were lovely words," Lily whispered. "Perfect words. Come here dumb jock."

"Try and stop me pencil neck."

And then they were kissing. It was more perfect than either of them could have imagined. Until…

"STOP THAT!" Emmeline yelled. "I'm his girlfriend."

"Let's get out of here," James murmured to Lily.

"YOU COME BACK HERE THIS INSTANT JAMES POTTER!" but she was ignored.

As Lily and James left the great hall hand in hand, Sirius entered it; wearing nothing but his boxers.

"See ya mate," James said, amused.

Sirius just winked.

Down by the black lake, Lily and James stood underneath the beech tree, kissing.

"So how are we going to do this?" Lily broke the kiss. "You are going off to play Quidditch and me going to Oxford."

"What?" James gasped.

Lily smiled. "You did it, it came this morning. Congratulations!"

"Oh my god I did it!" James laughed.

"We've done pretty well you and me," Lily said.

"You and me," he pulled her closer. "Or… I."

"Will you shut up and kiss me already?" Lily grabbed the back of his head.

And so, Lily and James went from hating each other completely, to being madly in love. Teenagers… who understands them?

**A/N: review lovely people! **


End file.
